How I ran into this book is a story in itself: I was making a web search of Finnish conductors, when my eye caught the phrase "Finnish conductor Aleksi Kullio". I was shocked to know that there is a Finnish professional conductor around whose name I don't know, and especially with such a funny last name! I of course had to follow the link, and soon it became clear that this name belongs to a fictitious character in a cheesy novel!

After reading the excerpts online, I decided that I just have to get this book! Thus, I ordered a used copy from UK Amazon with 1£ plus postage! Then I just devoured the book! I carried it with me everywhere! My colleagues were shocked to see me walk in the class with a bright red girlie book in hand, and the fact that it touched upon a very interesting subject of Finnish conductors did not help to mend my reputation.

I was really fascinated to read that besides being Finn and sharing a name (my second name is Aleksi!), maestro Kullio also sported long blonde ponytail - just like me at the time of reading the book! The book itself was not about maestro Kullio, but about Alison Sheffield, the spinster librarian working in the "Free Library of Philadelphia", who falls hopelessly in love with Kullio after seeing him conduct his inaugural concert as the new music director of "Philadelphia Philharmonic" (well, I guess that could happen, couldn't it?).

There was just one problem - maestro Kullio is married to a gorgeous blonde by the name of Michelle, and she is guarding him like a hawk! When Michelle comes to the public library to look for books about poisons, Alison decides that she must be nuts and dangerous, so first of all it is OK for any loving woman to save a good man from a jealous nutcase, and secondly, she also might save his life in case Michelle really plans to poison her husband.

Spoiler Warning!

So, the majority of the book passes by while Alison tries to spy on Michelle and find out if there really exists any grave danger to her beloved maestro Kullio. We also learn a lot about her sex life - or rather the lack of it, and learn everything about her family, friends, food and drink habits etc. She makes the bold move to get closer to Kullio by volunteering to work in the orchestra archives (wouldn't it be great if every orchestra had a couple of love-sick librarians working in the archives!!!), finds some correspondence between Stokowski and Stravinsky, and manages to catch his attention with this discovery.

The book, despite its cheesiness and despite the main character being such a stupid airhead, was interesting to read - until the horrible discovery that Kullio in fact is the Bad Guy of the story!!! Yes, he courts librarians only to steal their manuscripts to send them back to his mom in the poor deprived Eastern-block country called Finland, whose libraries are really badly maintained and have such a poor collection of music manuscripts!!! Can you believe that? The country which has one of the best public library systems in the world, where the literacy has been 100% for a hundred years already, the hi-tech country which gave Nokia to the world, has this kind of crooks going around stealing stuff?!? Never mind that Finland regularly tops the government anti-corruption list, Aleksi will continue sending stolen scores to his mom in some kind of politbyro library wing (Finland was never part of Soviet Union, mind you)... I immediately lost appetite for the character I had felt so much closeness for 231 pages! In the end Kullio ends up in jail and Alison finds the true love in her boss in the library. How disappointing! I was so disheartened that I immediately wanted to get rid of my pony tail not to remind myself of that disgusting criminal Kullio!

Anyway, it was an entertaining read, and if they ever want to make a movie out of it, I can grow my hair back to play the part of Kullio. For $$$ of course! And the ending should changed to be more glamorous. I could for example smuggle the scores to Venezuela, or China, which both are destined to be the next superpowers of classical music!

P.S. My next book review will hopefully be more substantial and professional one: a brand new book Beyond the Baton by my American colleague Diane Wittry.